Refurbishe

Mindfuck.

2011-09-10T17:08:00.001+08:00

Everytime I think of you, it's a mindfuck.

Can't concentrate. Can't get any work done.

Wasting my energy analyzing how things between us are just not quite right.

New Year's Eve

2010-12-31T22:11:00.001+08:00

I need a tumblr.

Misery needs company.

2010-11-28T00:55:00.001+08:00

Tears and solitude are the most trusted companions.

I just wanna be your Princess.

2010-11-28T00:54:00.004+08:00

"Cinderella walked on broken glass.

Sleeping Beauty let a whole lifetime pass.

Belle fell in love with a hideous beast.

Jasmine married a common thief.

Ariel walked on land for love and life.

Snow White barely escaped a knife.

It was all about blood, sweat, and tears, because love means facing your biggest fears."

Insecurities.

2010-11-27T12:22:00.000+08:00

Why so insecure.

Not To Belong.

2010-11-18T13:34:00.005+08:00

There's no place in this world for an emogirl. ):

So much for asking people to Be Themselves.
The extroverts just have it easy.

DSFC

2010-11-07T00:32:00.001+08:00

Went for the amazing daniel siow's sharing session today. Watching MJ people have fun is just enough to make me happy. (: MJLOVE. -vibrates heart-

Happy outing.

2010-11-05T14:47:00.005+08:00

2nd November 2010.

I was a very happy girl. (:

Fuck life, just dance.

2010-11-05T14:46:00.002+08:00

There's probably no need to think so much about life & the future. Just do what you enjoy doing.

Just dance.

I want my honeymoon back.

2010-09-20T00:56:00.002+08:00

Stress from work, from life, from upcoming facing of reality.

Learn to shut yourself in with tears not shown because no one will stop to pick you up. Not even the one closest to you.

Hungry > Sleepy.

2010-07-03T04:20:00.003+08:00

After a whole long day of dance, I climbed into bed at 0315 hoping to cram some sleep before another long day. But something felt amiss & despite tossing & turning I was up til 4. And then it hit me that all I've had for the previous day was a yakun meal & half a burger. Wahseh immediately I jumped out of bed & threw some noodles to cook. Tummy ache > body+head ache.

Fucked.

2010-06-18T15:42:00.002+08:00

Neck is burning & my hands feel cold.
Some things are really better left unknown.

I've spent so much time, money & effort but now I have no idea what I'm doing all these for.

Red Glittery Paper.

2010-06-08T00:30:00.003+08:00

He says he doesn't think he should be the one most important thing in my life.

And vice versa, whaaat

Holidays.

2010-06-04T21:38:00.005+08:00

Recently came to realize that my body's become wired to automatically smile when I'm aware that a camera's around. Cool.

Say hi to Chuck, my bestie for the hols. (:

):

2010-04-23T22:27:00.001+08:00

Aiwei Reythem Chan shouldn't have been born a girl.

):

2010-02-21T00:07:00.001+08:00

I feel very sad but like, there's no one to turn to.

Busybee.

2010-01-23T14:27:00.003+08:00

My mom is so cute, she saw me busying over AB5 the whole morning & made me a cup of iced milo which looked all high-class on a tall cup, wooden coaster & even an unopened subway straw at the side.

(: Thanks mom.

Romance Addict.

2010-01-17T01:12:00.002+08:00

Shoppe list.

2009-12-30T19:31:00.007+08:00

NEEDS:

1. more jackets/blazers
2. shoes
3. long topzzz
4. skinnys
5. beeg teeshirts
6. normal collar shirts
7. dresses
8. stockings

Awwman~

Happy day.

2009-12-30T19:07:00.004+08:00

Even though my GPA's a joke, I'm very happy today.
Walking around aimlessly doing silly stuff, playing with toys & crooning over fat hamsters, sharing toast & ice-cream with you is more than I can ask for.

And I bought new baba pants. Boy are they maaad cheap :3

Blast in the Heart.

2009-12-18T00:11:00.008+08:00

I'm not a cheesy crappy romantic loveydovey kind of girl. So it's quite alarming to see that these words are actually coming out under my fingers.

Hear boy,
You don't realize that the world can seem to come crashing down with little things that you say or do or feel, because you don't believe that you've become my world.

Sugar have some faith in me, don't let wild thoughts get us down.
If what I'm giving isn't enough, tell me what it is & I'll give you more, just don't shrug and keep it all to yourself.

Is it that for every minute I'm missing you you're desperately trying to pull away?
Is that why while I'm excitedly hunting for the better dress to doll up as your date you're remaining emotionlessly nonchalent about everything?

It's beginning to dawn on me that alot of things that I've done that I thought would make you proud & make you love me more isn't really hitting the spot. You don't need me to be very pretty. You don't need me to be very bubbly & enthusiastic. You don't need me to have a lot of friends.

You taught me to love, and I've learnt, even though I may not be the best at showing it. Maybe I've unwittingly made some mistakes along the way. Has that changed many things?

Now I'm stuck in this nightmare of a non-existent fairytale, wondering what to do next because I don't want to get out.

*

I bought you a gingerbread bear from korea,
but when I picked it up just now its leg cracked off.
So I can't give it to you anymore.
):
And the stupid bear is still smiling, like nothing is wrong.

Podding.

2009-12-16T14:36:00.004+08:00

>

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

-

Hello holidays! (:

Random.

2009-11-19T23:31:00.003+08:00

Always in the heart (: (:

What The Fuck?

2009-11-14T02:46:00.003+08:00

6 days to the first paper, 3 weeks before I fly, 4 weeks to 1.5years.
Time really flies, doesn't it?

You're awesome for being you (:
Night out was great.
In the midst of them wtfffs,
I'm glad you love me too.
Thank you J,
The one & only, but the best of the best.

It's about time for the breakup season to end.

Tonight's Gonna be a Good Night.

2009-11-09T01:09:00.003+08:00

Tonight's the night
Let's live it up
I got my money
Let's spend it up
Go out and smash it
Like Oh My God
Jump off that sofa
Let's kick it, off!

I know that we'll have a ball
If we get down
And go out
And just lose it all
I feel stressed out
I won't let it go
Let's go way out spaced out
And loosing all control

Fill up my cup
Mazel tov
Look at her dancing
Just take it, off!
Let's paint the town
We'll shut it down
Let's burn the roof
And then we'll do it again

Lets do it
Lets do it
Lets do it
Lets do it
And do it
And do it
Let's live it up

Cause I gotta feeling
That tonight's gonna be a good good night

Immersing yourself in a happiness faked from too much sorrow.
It kinda pains me.

Why Must You Be So

2009-10-30T13:44:00.003+08:00

It's something we all want,
so just because you can't get it doesn't mean I'm not upset being unable to give it to you.
10AUs, how apt a description.

Finally back, why don't we smile a little?

Crazy in Romance Bug.

2009-10-29T01:00:00.022+08:00

Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly

Everyone's a romance junkie these days.
One day late, but I'm still waiting.

REALLY SHOULD BE STUDYING.
Bizplan proposal&presentation
+ FM presentation
+ Accounting midterms
+ Facebook presentation
+ Commfunds presentation
+ FM test,
all happening in the coming consecutive weeks.
(with EOYs following right after that)
Srsly, wtfman
I hate uni >:(
-chomps on laptop-
It screws up your bioclock & makes you 24/7 shagggg.

A Sense of Disquiet.

2009-10-25T02:59:00.007+08:00

Because I was thinking of you.

've been feeling a little weird inside these days, in a things-seem-to-be-going-good but actually something's wrong way. Everyone around's just making me miss banka so much ): Hmm school's going fine, friends and everything're ohhkay, studies are a bit like shit & I'm super unproductive though I've no freakin idea why. Maybe I'm sianedout by Bizsolutions, cos it seems like such an awesome you-will-have-a-bright-future kinda club but so far it just bores me out so much. It could be cheer, because no matter how I try I just don't seem to be doing it right. Or it could be dance, because I dunno why Patrick selected me that day when I don't think I deserved it & worse when I screwed up in the video (which's taking hell long to get uploaded & making me refresh facebook like mad) so I think his choice was to secretly mock me. Or ultimately it could just be the severe lack of sleep, from doing nonsense, from trying without avail to mug, from playing with my <3jichio. Which kinda means I oughta head to bed soon because I'm shagged out again despite waking up at 1pm & taking a nap since then.

Life just makes me feel, oddly nauseous.

iPhone 3GS!

2009-10-19T15:16:00.003+08:00

Everyone! SAY HI TO MY NEW FRIEND :D
Her name is jichio
And she is white, sleeek & one helluva sexy shit.

<3
I'd be really happy if you would buy her pink clothes, because a white flippy pouch can only last me this long.

Craving for a new hole.

2009-10-17T16:55:00.003+08:00

I want to get my tongue pierced. Maybe when the sem ends, when I've got no more presentations, and when I'm back from Korea.

Missing You.

2009-10-11T18:38:00.009+08:00

I look forward to every night,
'cos that's when I can unseal another letter
And hear your voice again.

University Blues.

2009-08-18T23:37:00.000+08:00

I miss my boyfriend, my vooman, & my family.
):
It took me so long to really realize they're all that mean anything to me.

Fuggerfly.

2009-07-08T23:08:00.009+08:00

Something retarded just happened.

While I was happily youtubing and laughing my ass off at silly videos a fly decided to land on the top rim of my glasses. Freaked out, I plucked my glasses off and flung it around, hoping that the stupid bug will get thrown off. Don't know what's its problem but it hung on for very long, and cos no specs = cannot see properly = cannot really tell if the bug is still here. Then I also don't dare to put my face too close in case it flies into my eye and poke me or sth. Luckily I had a brainblast; ran to the bathroom and before it could crawl up onto my hand, washed it away under running water!

HAH fuck you fly.

PS: Baby's baccck!
PPS: Signed up for Stellar09, I wonder who else would be there? Like seriously.

Heeba Hooba.

2009-07-07T19:41:00.025+08:00

QUIT MAH JOB :D -shakes ass happily-
Hahah fine so I couldn't stand people acting like they're forever busy/at work/cooking dinner and have no time to entertain my insanely long & kaypoh interview.
Thought I wouldn't get any moolah since I didn't hit quota at all BUT turns out my successful telephone call x1 and house visit x0.85 earned me $25 HAHA.
So yay, at least pay off my transport & phone bills.
(No kidding kay, the phone calls can last up to half an hour per household, plus oh the countless calls that faced rejection INCLUDING ONE THAT WENT OVERSEAS -.-)
Agency had better not point at the corner of the contract, make me squint at some fine-print which says I-whateverwhatever-so-cannot-get-pay, nyeh nyeh.

On the other hand, they offered me some 8day Loreal promoter job which's like end of this month. Sounds waay better than hounding poor housewives or overseas husbands to answer questions I couldn't care less about. NBSFOC hurrry spill the results so I can plan my schedule eh D:

The whole talk about those camps choosing applications based on looks are really starting to bug me. And seeing the tagboard with posts from like handsomeguy & prettygirl & uglyboy makes me fucking queasy. My face totally -.- Haha SERIOUSLY who the hell calls themselves these things?! Not only face skin damn thick, still come and say all kinds of dulan shit. Chio is a blessing already okay, just shut up be thankful and don't go around making people feel bad luh. Say this kinda things will truamatize ugly people. And for those idiots who wanna sign up just for the hot girls, go somewhere else please don't taint my new school with your shallowness. Worse things' that the committee's never fiercely stood up to against those rumors or anything. -shrug- I dunno, maybe they're too busy preparing stuffs to care what people say orrr maybe it's just (sadly) true.
Either way, we freshies with no power can only sit back and pray. Damn poor things right hahah.
But then again! Orientation camp eh, it really doesn't make sense to have selections for that can. I mean if dd > ss, there can always NBSFOC round 2, and if dd >> ss then round 3 and 4 and 10 until everyone gets a place right. Since the seniors've put in so much effort to organize the camp, why not let more people enjoy it?
Ahf.
Since the whole process of uni application started, there's been far too many choose, apply, wait, hope, results.
I don't like being judged so many times in a row ):

Sexy shiney shimmery shitz.

2009-07-05T00:21:00.022+08:00

Here's to a change of mind.
I plucked out the gems on my phone, and blinged my mirror & earpiece instead :D
Yay for shiney shitzz!

Day-in/out with family was good.
Happy parents make me happy girl (:

I realized another thing today
& it's a little frightening.
I think if I were to one day fall, there really wouldn't be anyone out there whom I can count on to pick me up.
);

Cheering yourself.

2009-07-03T23:21:00.017+08:00

I spent $ on silly girly things today.
It made me happy.
My phone is now studded silver & black, my nails are hot pink.
I threw craft materials into the box, and kept the elephants to show you! :)

Note:
1. Only idiots try to bling their SE W880i.
The bloody jewels are taller than the keys, so my keyboard is left blank :(
2. Turns out black bling = bad bling. My phone looks silver with holes in between, mmm.
3. But well; it was 2bucks, I was bored.

I'm gonna leave it on anyway. Maybe it'll distract me from wanting a new phone for a while.

Surprise.

2009-07-01T23:16:00.003+08:00

:D!
BABY JUST CALLED,
All the way from Brunei!!
Omgomgomgg
Damn now I just miss him more than ever :(

We were both young, when I first saw you.

2009-07-01T22:58:00.002+08:00

Bloody hotness.

2009-06-29T15:04:00.013+08:00

Hello world, it's been quite a while.
I am currently employed :) The fujitsu lifebook is quite pretty. The words on the screen are damn small though and it's cute to see the elderly surpervisors straining their eyes & fingers to jab the right buttons with stylus. Oh but they made us go take passport size photos though -.- Fucking waste money, $10 for 8 pictures and you know how gross those usually turn out. My room's filled with forms & papers & 3 huge books for reference/instructions, see already sian, I think I'll just call and try my luck and don't worry so much. People please be friendly and don't rape me when I go visit you.

Stayover with Jinghan was the awesomest.
Grand Copthorne suite with big tv & big bed & big windows, air-con 24/7.
Complete with bathrobes, jacuzzi and breakfast. Waah~
And boxfuls of mini-cornettos alongside good movies in bed.
Happy (belated) One Year sweetheart,

More more more :D

There're so many H1N1 cases popping out everywhere. (And it's so hard to pronounce, his mom just calls it hi-nee) Makes me feel like hermiting forever. Outside's not all that fun, anyway.

I don't care what you think about me,
It can't be worse than what I think about you.
HA HA, kiss my ass.

Romeo & Cinderella.

2009-06-16T11:44:00.017+08:00

Strolling down a grassy path 2 hours before book-in,
he suddenly grabbed her hand & broke into a sprint.
"! Why're we running," she asked, struggling to keep up.
"Come on baby," he said,
"If we run fast enough, maybe time will slow down. & then I won't have to leave so soon."
Face lightning up with a grin she sped off, them racing against the inevitable, leaving yesterday's shit behind and laughing like they're having the time of their lives.

I want a cup of cock.

2009-06-13T19:05:00.004+08:00

Daddy was msging mommy who was at NTUC buying groceries.
"Anything you want her to buy?"
"Yeah, 1.5L soft drinks. Sprite, coke, 7-up..."
And he texted,
"1.5L sprite, cock and 7up."

Hermitish headache.

2009-06-11T22:10:00.003+08:00

I'm quite proud of myself cos recently it feels like I'm evolving into a proper woman :D Hahah okay it sounds kinda stupid but like I've been cooking lunches whenever I'm home in the afternoon, trying out random recipes and sewing stuff. They don't always turn out as nice as I'd hope though. Don't understand why my chunky campbelle soup bubbles so vigorously when I boil it, aiyo, keep adjusting the fire smaller but the bubbles still pop & fly around. ): Don't like hot spraying broth.
And and my marcoroni expands like #$%&. I put half bowl in, 2 bowls come out. In the end cannot finish then mommy just throw it into the dinner-soup for fun.
Never mind at least it's a start! Not bad for a home-ec noob like me okay, who wasted my years learning music instead. Honestly, I doubt anybody cares if I can recite the modulations of Prokofiev's I-can't-remember-what-song or which particular brass imitates the main melody in the strings.

OCS is a bitch; sup with the 745328 field camps mannn.
Time fly please, time fly faster.

S factor & clicktv kept me entertained for most of today. Can't believe I'm saying this but I'm beginning to think that Xiaxue is actually quite lurb :3 Maybe it's the mild similarities. More because she's sucha girl. The annoying effect of superstrong singlish fades after a while, and who can hate shiney blinged gadgets, minor bod-mods & truckloads of pink?

Candy-sweet bliss.

2009-06-07T23:22:00.003+08:00

I AM VERY HAPPY TODAY.
I'm sure the seahorse knows why (:

You my sunny ray.

2009-05-28T12:28:00.003+08:00

Accompanied the boyfriend this morning to get his x-ray done (woke up at 7:19AM OKAY, sweet right sweet righttt :B heh) On our way back we ran for the bus cos it was at a-bit-far-but-actually-can-catch-it distance, and this random dude who we chiong pass went "run baby run~" in the right tune. HAHA.

I hate periods because it screws up beach dates ):

Uni choices are annoying the shit out of me!
Can someone just help me make a decision.
-pitiful face-
MEH

Gloom but much love in the end.

2009-05-21T22:03:00.017+08:00

Hey Jinghan,

HAPPY 11 MONTHS (:
Tonight's phone calls were gushing with loveeee, despite all the awful shit you had to tell me. It feels good to know just how much you want to protect & shield this clueless stupid girl from all the evil creatures out there. You've no idea how crappy I feel for having put you through all these. Wish I could just live in a little japanese cottage wearing a beige frock and pouring tea for you everyday hahah. Yes, Japan, not US. But that shall be a debate for another day :B Well good luck for your test tmrw. I'm super proud of you having survived ten-day fieldcamp, especially with all the unnecessary extra #$%& piled on, and I'll say gomaenasai for the #$% that I contributed. Yes sucks to hear that people around you say things about me, that I myself don't even know exist. Hurts like fuck and maybe baby it hurts you even more because you're the one having to fight it off. A hug for you for believing in me. That aside, I'm really glad you've got some bros who'll help pull you through this hell. It don't really matter if they think I'm a terrible girl but I'm just thankful they'll (and can) be there for you when you're down. Makes me feel a bit better knowing that there're people taking care of you while I can't be by your side. As for me, I'll figure a way to live armydays better alright. Hate to be cheesy, but here's truly a big thank you for being My Angel in disguise. Stay strong baby, soon it'll be all over & back to just you and me, running together without a care for the world.

Hugs, kisses & a nip on the neck,
Your Girlfriend.

Kiss me through the phone.

2009-05-20T00:11:00.006+08:00

It used to be reject & regret.
Now, I've learnt that it's regret anyway.
I'm sick of hurting you, so fucking sorry.
Everything it just totally sucks.
Kill the bastardbug that bit me.

Baby, you know that I miss you
I wanna get with you
Tonight but I can't now baby girl and that's the issue
Girl you know I miss you
I just wanna kiss you
But I can't right now so baby kiss me through the phone
Kiss me through the phone
I'll see you later on
Kiss me through the phone
Kiss me through the phone
See you when I get home

Six seven eight triple nine eight two one two,
Mmm Soulja is da Boy [:
Pause life, play music.

I'm staying up for you tonight, because I want to.

Money & clothes is love.

2009-05-15T20:22:00.023+08:00

SHOPPING DAY :D like finally vooman, omgzx

Cheap shopping makes happy girls.
(: (:

Plus we endorse extensions!
(Actually no, not really)
But if you're getting any at far east visit the shop at level1/B1, they do it better.

Speaking of endorsement, I'm suddenly reminded of that group of god-knows-what-lotion-brand people that we met around Tangs around common test period 2008 :D
Remember remember,
and we purposely bought new watches in case we can't see the clock in the hall.
Hahah. Good ol' days.

Labrets & Snakebites.

2009-05-14T13:13:00.012+08:00

O Holy shiet :3
Can you hear my adrenaline pump?

Late night trinkies.

2009-05-12T00:05:00.008+08:00

NUS Law doesn't want me.
Instead, I got offered some-course-which-I-randomly-put-cos-there-ain't-anything-else-I-want-from-NUS-actually.
But well it was pretty expected, afterall I already KNEW I screwed up. Never felt so stupid (like literally stupid) in my whole life. UGH.
If I don't hear any news from SMU soon, it'll be hello NTU Accountancy.
At least the professor liked my smile. -chews lip-

*

They say I've changed, you think?

At this very moment, I'm missing a lot of people.
Gorrrrlie :B for one,
Back in school there was always time together & we could see each other every day from morning til lunch til after school and still talk on the phone at night.
:] NJ was only bearable because of you dammit.
But I hate you because you're always busy/no mood & because I don't have unlimitied SMSes and you don't call.
Also cos you're going overseas and leaving me alone for a week, and with no decent company for this saturday's party.
But if you buy me something pretty from Taiwan, I will still love you.
You can ride on my hot-air balloon & we can summon the spirits of hateful bastards.

Just a point to note, I'm extending my Singtel contract, so hopefully jobfilled til June/July.
But I shall call up _ tmrw anyway because $10/h sounds damn sexy.

*

I wanna call myself Evan.
Evan Chan.
Aiwei Evanchan.

My sex band broke.

2009-05-11T16:44:00.017+08:00

I like looking out of the window, seeing cars stuck in a jam
next to low rows of run-down buildings;
Especially when the rain has stopped
and the weather is cool,
It makes me think of us and all
the things that we could do.

I'll keep tossing rocks at your window
There's no turning back for us tonight
CHECKYESJUILET/ on the Replay
Run baby, run
Don't ever look back
They'll tear us apart if
You give them the chance
Don't sell your heart
Don't say
We're not meant to be
Run baby, run
Forever will be
You and me.

Sickness.

2009-05-08T16:37:00.006+08:00

Oneitis; (form of social disease)

Often confused with love, this is the feeling that a particular woman is actually special. This is just an illusion; she is the same as the other three or so billion. "Go fuck ten other women" is the most commonly prescribed treatment for this "disease" (hence the "itis"), as it tends to show quite quickly how very alike people are.

Changes for the better future (:

2009-05-05T00:28:00.014+08:00

All bad things come to and end (:

This is a jumble of hotcakes & hash brown chunks.
They look so alike but taste very different.

T.J.H.I.L.Y.!

-

If x = my shopping list & y = my shopping,
dx/dt > dy/dt
since dx/dy = (dx/dt) . (dt/dy)
dx/dy > 1
#

Reflections.

2009-04-28T16:40:00.002+08:00

April 2009 had been a crazy month.
I've let myself done a lot of shit, & too many people got hurt.
Tough as it may be it's time to set things right. That is, if things can even ever go back to how it used to be in the first place.
Why does it have to be so hard?
Love isn't everything,
because we all know that love changes.

Saddening stuff.

2009-04-23T23:22:00.008+08:00

If I were a character in a drama serial, I think I'd turn out to be the one who the audience curse and swear at.

*

Previous posts've been kinda skimpy.

1. Boyfriend's in army
2. Working in Singtelshop still
3. Accepted into NTU Accountancy
4. But praying for good news from NUS Law OMG
5. Nursing a week-old piercing
6. Needing good, decent company
7. Someone please ask me out to do something crazy :D
(6 & 7 kinda contradicts but ohcomeon I'm sure we can work sth out)
Well,
that sums up the important stuff.

It's good when what you need is right next to you.
It's bad when what you want is something you can't have.
It's hard to tell when everyone hears a different story.

I'm hell glad for you you're moving on
xoxo

I wanna feel pretty.

2009-04-22T15:03:00.014+08:00

So freakin gorgeous.
I needa shop zomgggg

):

2009-04-21T23:01:00.005+08:00

Hey loverboy
Cheer up, it pains me to see you like this.
Camp may be hell but you still have me ):
& on the 21st. Don't don't cannot ):

I very badly need to tan. Haven't felt good sun on my skin in too bloody long.

On an afterthought,
Will someone design a butterfly tattoo for me?

Second thoughts.

2009-04-20T23:35:00.005+08:00

It's timeout for fun & time to get back into the stay-at-home & play pet society mode.
Venturing a little too far from the banks can drown.
Fish in the water can bite.
Worse of all the current can wash you far, far away.

Began to realize that it's usually a lose-lose kinda situation, no point in trying because you're always gonna be wrong.

The past week'd been filled with good company.
Helium, pink hair, double diamonds, movies & treats.
Nice long chats.
You people know who you are, thanks for everything.

But baby can I just want you?
Damn.
In 25 minutes comes another month-anniversary [:
Come remind me how 10months ago felt.

Navel, surprise.

2009-04-16T00:30:00.008+08:00

Navel piercing today <3
Today ie. wednesday, whyd's 12am seem to come so fast
Feels good that I actually went ahead and did it.

No pictures, come ask if you wanna see my new darlin.

Remember this?

2009-04-04T23:55:00.011+08:00

& I'm missing you so much,

it's starting to kinda hurt.

April Fools.

2009-04-01T23:10:00.002+08:00

A little lonely,
& oddly cold.
I think it's just tonight.

Spent my day at the infocounter, folding paper and drawing chibis.
Wonder if people think I'm autistic [:

Appearing offline makes me feel happy & sad at the same time.

The sound of lizards' footsteps scare me.

Lol, strangerfriend.

2009-03-31T23:23:00.013+08:00

On msn,
; Job hours're like, best if I work when normal people get off work.
-chants to keep inner peace-
: Aha, what a monk.
; Yes I shall call myself Ohmmm-san.
: And I should be Voltage-san right.
; Hurray for Physics people,
: So when I get on top of you, we'll produce current?

Lhol.

Singtel days, part two.

2009-03-29T15:53:00.011+08:00

At last, a break.
Thurday Friday Saturday had been 3 consecutive Singtel days, with yesterday's shift being ELEVEN HOURS.
-massages poor sore feet-

: Hi I'll like to upgrade my mobile phone.
; Okay. Your mobile number please?
: -recites-
; Right, and that line's under what name?
: Umm, my name.
; -stifles chuckle- Which is?
HAHA dear people, I can't tell your name by seeing your face y'know.

: Hi I'm currently a Starhub subscriber, I'd like to hop over to Singtel.
; Kay your IC number please?
: The Starhub or Singtel one?
This one's from Gro, haha. We think usually people only have one IC number.

: Hi I wanna recontract and get the Silver F480.
Can give me a new set?
AHA aiyo, buy phone eh, of course give new set luh.

: Hi, I'll like to purchase a Blueberry.

; You mean Blackberry?

This one Ultimate. And it happened so many times.

(:
I like nice customers who come back to find me when they've decided to sign up/buy stuff, thinking I'll get commission for that.
But since I don't, their compliments really do make up for it.
Yay for satisfied customers.

Oh
& Polie, happy belated 19th.
I hope you'll be smiling again soon <3

Social Freak.

2009-03-26T22:55:00.010+08:00

I'm a stranger to the whole social-people-relation thing.
Really. After more than ten years of struggling through living & its stupid ughs, I still have no idea how this game is played.

That kinda explains why I'm currently at home, in front of my laptop typing yet another fuck-this-life-sucks entry, instead of excitedly picking a dress and getting my makeup done.
Firstly, I'm already not one who likes to socialize very much.
Point established since eons ago;
LD, 3/4L, S18, WD, Rhythm, just to list the least.

I don't turn up for events or outings because I don't really feel like it and even if I was okay I don't mind going anything that's pass 12am will have to go through THE JURY which in some cases (like tonight) I'm not so keen enough to wanna fight my case with very much vigour.
How?
If don't go then will lose out in many things;- the fun, the company, the pictures, the :Dlurb with people.
But if go, have to;- find transport, spend money, go through that shit with D&M, less sleep.

Aha, quite dulan right.
And I figured that things aren't even that simple.
Say you don't go for stuff (God I can't even recall when was the last friggin time I went for a CLASS OUTING O.O), obviously you'll start drifting, and the more you drift the less you feel compelled to go. Ultimately all's gone & you're stamped with anti-social.

Everytime I'd find an excuse for the way things turn out, everytime I'll tell myself the next try it'll be better. After years & a trillion attempts, I'm still failing.

What's worse is that it's not like you don't like to hang out, it matters more of who it is you're hanging out with.
There are people who you'll cancel your week's schedule to fit, and some who you'll fake a whole week's schedule to avoid.
I think it rocks to be my boyfriend because I honestly don't really want anyone else but you.
Haha, how ridiculous huh.
I don't understand myself.
I've never met another person who's found socializing such a fucken hysterical chore.

And so when your free days become more frequent, your time more worthless.
So what if I have a string of days at your disposal?
It wouldn't mean shit cos you're the hotstuff, & I'm just nothing.

Food for thought:
If you're a girl who can't turn heads,
would your boyfriend still love you?

It's -.- to think women stay forever young and pretty like you first met them,
because they don't.
& when you've sucked enough of their youth & beauty and realized that the chick around the block's hotter than your girl,

Then what?

I'mma sleep early.

2009-03-25T23:17:00.005+08:00

I like spending days like these.

Promised baby I'll sleep early so here I am, keeping my promise (:

9 Months Lovee.

2009-03-21T20:41:00.010+08:00

Rainbow in the midst of the orange sky to celebrate a lovely nine month with us.

Good food, bad weather, very good company.

Night I couldn't sleep.

2009-03-21T01:58:00.011+08:00

I have some colleagues who're kinda weird, and just a few in a kinda lurb way.

Brother ate my cookies.

2009-03-20T23:39:00.018+08:00

CALL KAI LUH, CALL LUH >:(

've been feeling slightly nauseaous lately.
It's not very good that most of the things you see/experience tend to make you queasy.
Doctor says I'm generally allergic to human beings.

Dad wants me to try for a scholarship in university.
According to him, "scholarship de qian bu na bai bu na".
Yeah true luh, but must also know my limits right?
Outstanding intellect, strong leadership potential, sound character, passion for innovation and creativity?
Hahaha come on man.
ON TOP OF THAT I'd need a referee to like promote me, probably a teacher or smthn.
"Ask sharon phua?"
Best.

I'm glad I'm not working full-time at the Singtel Shop for the rest of my life. In face I'm quite glad I'm merely a student on holiday, wasting time waiting for school to start (: Don't ask for so much.

Darling hush don't say a word,
if I'm just here to fill the holes of your time.

Grabbing by the minutes.

2009-03-18T23:38:00.013+08:00

Finally, the long overdue trip to Manhattan Fish Market.

Presenting to you the Seafood Platter for Two.

Hokay actually it's just a portion of the seafood platter for two, we ate the fish and some of everything else before going EH SHIT neh take picture.

I wish everyday was like this, with no reason to quarrel or be unhappy.

Happy birthday boyfriend's brother.
I bought him a bottle of black nail polish (aha, won't tell you why) as present.
But he didn't let it dry and itchyhand search his pocket for something and dirtied new white berms, which didn't manage to be completely cleaned after that so there's a patch of greyish stain now.
Meh, so much for trying to be nice.

Few other things happened, but nothing seems important enough to pen down.
Then again it's not like any of the above's really significant anyways.
Go figure.

Dammit.

2009-03-14T22:21:00.000+08:00

Fuckk, I should stop taking your criticism so harshly.

You leave me in a blank.

2009-03-14T00:23:00.005+08:00

In general, today was quite shit.
(Or more accurately yesterday, since it's already past 12.)

Plans got cancelled last minute,
I called you up & you were nearby,
thought you'd pop over, say hi.
Ploughed through Uni stuff,
with Mom's blabbering echoed in mind,
realized choice by interest is blind.
Bookmarked facs with a bit more promise,
included Acc, Law, effing Medicine,
head was pounding & had to head to work.
Dialed your number, the phone rang,
you didn't pick up, I left a message.
Called back, said you were busy,
you sounded happyily at dance,
so a fraction of me was glad.
Changed, the polo felt so huge,
hair so messy, eye so sore,
forced on some makeup,
to cover up the flaws.
Wouldn't even mention the things that went wrong at work.
Got home, just waiting to hear your voice,
& I had to screw it up.
So perhaps, it all comes down,
to being my fault once again.

I always tell myself to SLEEP EARLY, because I do nonsense online at night when my eyebags should be getting their therapy.
But things happen.

Curse of the Leopard-print Dress.

2009-03-12T23:02:00.018+08:00

Yesterday, I broke the Curse of the Leopard-print Dress.

Although it made me eye pain/ drop my contact into the sink/ tummyache/ cannot find jacket/ no time to put on make-up/ CHIONG for the bus in feet-unfriendly shoes, I'm happy to say that the day ended well (:

Again I recall why I'm not the blogging-type person.

Inspired.

2009-03-11T17:08:00.011+08:00

This is my new inspiration.
<3
I wanna learn how to make my own clothes too!

Scarves & hats should live in harmony,
so furry boots can join in the fun too.

Damn I'm a sucker for nice looking things.

Future thoughts.

2009-03-09T20:00:00.012+08:00

When I grow up
I wanna be famous
I wanna be a star
I wanna be in movies

When I grow up
I wanna see the world
Drive nice cars
I wanna have groupies

When I grow up
Be on TV
People know me
Be on magazines

When I grow up
Fresh and clean
Number one chick when
I step out on the scene

But now I've grown up, seen more of the world and am not sure what I wanna be. Looking back I think I've let too many precious opportunities go, it was at the time when STUDY was the topmost priority and nothing else should take up bulks of my time. How contradicting; in school I was taught to grab chances when they appear, while at home the parents always want me to do things steadily and if I may say, conservatively.
"There'll be many chances for you to act in the future, after you've completed what's important."
Baha, I knew from the moment these words left her lips that it wasn't true.
This world isn't that nice, and opportunities don't wait for you.
You aren't the queen, you aren't that great.
Let it pass & you lose.
End of story.
On another note, I've began to realize that the entertainment industry that many small girls would lurrve to be in isn't all that suitable for me. -Looks at Allyssa, points at Gina- So well childhood aspirations stay just what they are - mere dreams.
I've been psychoed into someone too practical, and someone not passionate enough.

Fastforward 10 years and I'm preparing to enter uni.
So many courses to choose from, so many factors to consider.
Interest, can I get in, will I be able to cope, duration, future job options, economic situation, double degree?
Science-related stuffs out,
Business's not practical in the recession,
Law's gonna be tough,
Social Science's useless.
Accounting/Economics sounds too dry for me.
Dammit I've been taking the conventional Science-route for too long to turn back and start doing Arts/Design/The-Things-I-Like.

Ugh, offdays make me think. My time's better spent loading music & nigahiga videos into my ipod (who's proudly named Babypod, yay. It's the first name that came into my head when I saw that darling dressed in her pink suit. -cooes-) Ryan Higa FTW! No one can beat those retarded-in-a-cute-way expressions on his face :D

Went to see doctor in the afternoon, wah really damn easymoney. All he did was talk to me a bit, ask me to say AH, listened to my lungs, bargained over the MC (he said 2days, I insisted on 3) then asked me to wait outside and collect medicine and pay.
O.o I wasn't even in the room for 5 minutes luh.

Aha, what the shit, at least I get to skip work.
-celebrates & hurries off to watch Desperate Housewives, THE BEST SERIAL EVER <3-

Singtel days.

2009-03-08T23:31:00.009+08:00

Back to work, after 2 days of absence. For some reason I didn't really miss the shop much.

Thursday - Throat itchys.
Throw in bubble tea & yakking away to customers.
Friday - Voice gets a lil weird.
Add iced mocha & results zomgdsfudhsfhs.
Saturday - Voice huskys.
Fried chicken, inability to stay quiet next to J, screaming @ danceworks, and more.
Sunday - Voice 95% gone.

"Ask you not to kiss so much already, see, now no more voice. Tell you already don't want to listen."
Lol, that's my manager for you.
But well I got that spot behind the cashier just for a day, I'd be useless on the floor. Feels terrible to be semi-unable to speak. Customers have to wince & strain their ears to try to catch your offpitch can-I-have-your-IC-please. I decided not to bother explaining the promotions we were having since they'd prolly not be able to understand all those croaking anyway.

There were some -.- customers today, eg. quite-old man want to buy+top-up prepaid card, man pass me phone, I put SIMcard in, switch on phone, greeted by wallpaper of 2 naked women in the sea, tits hanging and all those shit. I was like lol, okay sorry hurry return phone. Men are all horny bastards deep down inside I swear. Don't deny it luh.

But also got cute boy :D :D
Small boy that was really very cute. He was so small he could sit on the ledge of the cashier's counter.
His parents bought hi!card, and mommy took out a $50 note and handed to us. His huge pretty eyes stared at the note as it travelled from mom's hand to cashier's hand.
Then his eyes STARTED TO WELL UP IN TEARS.
!!
Mommy chuckled, hugged him and said, "It's okay, jie jie will give you back many more notes,"
So boy looked at cashier & waited patiently, his eyes still wet.
The sounds of the machine whirred on as the receipts were being printed.
Boy stared.
Still no money.
Whirring noises got louder, and just as the cashierthing was about to spring open, the boy BURST OUT IN TEARS. He wailed and cried like his ahma just died.
So cuteee! Haha damn drama luh he.
We kena shocked, then hurry grabbed the change and shoved 3 $10 notes at his face but he didn't stop crying.
Eeeeeyo~ :3 Pay for purchase only what, why so sad. Haha kids are so stupid and adorable.

I like blogging about nonsensical, superficial stuff.
It makes me feel like life isn't so serious afterall (:

Baby's sick too, so he slept early and we didn't talk much on the phone.
I think it's a ploy to make me miss him more.
Hurry get well soon,
I hope it wasn't my fault.

Feels good to be in love.

2009-03-07T23:42:00.012+08:00

Baby's proud of my results; I'm happy with them too. I wouldn't say I really completely deserved it, thinking about all the people who have put in as much hard work/always done well consistently, who should've scored something better than me. Feels a bit like the best thing to do now's to shut up and not ask how others did even if you're doing so in a good-intention way. Well being me & believing in my own logic, things'll eventually even themselves out as we gain some, lose some. Can't seem to make myself feel too happy, the grades haven't seemed to sink in yet.

Well the parents are exhilarated (: Which's a good thing. For all the shit I've given to my dearest dad & mom, I hope this sorta make things a little better. For all the tuition$$ they threw into this gamble with cambridge, I hope it's all worth it in the end. I love you two even though I rarely say it. Brother was cute, he msged me with "wah, win already lor." My dear smartass from HCfreakinI, mug hard & I'm sure you'll be beyond fine (:

To the others who did well: Congrats & you've earned it :D
To those who did just alright: Don't worry too much cos there's still loads of choices around, as well as tons who did worse :D
All these tend to sound crappy coming from me maybe, but I do mean them okay!

SMU open house left me with wanting to take Business & Social Science.
& joining the gourmet club, because they gave free marshmellows in chocolate fudge :3
& salsaaa.
Apply apply apply, hope for the best.

Went over to dhobby for late lunch, J freaking made me cry because it was raining and there was LIGHTNING and he insisted on walking there even though his umbrella is METAL. Damn scary luh! It wasn't just one road some more okay, have to walk quite far without shelter & wait at traffic light for the stupid green man to appear. But we stood near lamp posts/the traffic light cos they're metal too and lightning will choose to strike them first. There were people walking about without any form of shelther too, those crazy shits. Please, zomgg the scary can.

Was supposed to catch a movie but ~~being too cheapo~~ having no good timings we decided to skip it. Then randomly walked towards PS & managed to catch the Danceworks preliminaries :D (Or "some dance festival thing, got a lot of people dancing there", according to his friend) I totally forgot it was today! Watched a few groups, there were many malays & they were the lurb kind hurray. Didn't catch NJ's, it was over before we reached but the dance-off between our NJgirls & fierce-malay-opponent-group was quite an eye-opener. I NEVER KNEW OUR JUNIORS COULD MOVE LIKE THAT. Hawt stuff, these girls. Haha but Izzy was da lovee, when he appeared onstage in that bright blue top & striking red skinnys J was like, "Omg. Izzy." Like that's 'nuff said. Thinks Expo performance, thinks Rhythm, thinks ughstopthinking.

In short, these 2 days with baby out of camp have been very lurb & I can't wait for him to POP.

J, I love you <3
8 months and counting.

Part Two.

2009-03-05T22:56:00.009+08:00

I'm suddenly reminded of how people tend to pop in and out of our lives. And though some may still be physically around, they aren't really there in-your-life anymore cos they're too busy/caught up with something else to entertain you. Polies don't really exist in this world, unless you're goddamn friggin lucky.

White-specs guy was good company today, too bad it was his last day at work, and I never got to find out his name.
: Some customers really very stupid.
That day got one man looking at the promotion brochure, so I ask him,
"Hello sir, can I help you?"
He absently flipped to the page on broadband.
"Eh... Ze li you mei you mai xie?"
(Eh... Here got sell shoe or not?)
-.- Uh,
Damn dulan, so I open the brochure,
-observes mobile phones on page very intently-
-turns to man with apologetic face-
"Uhhmmmm... Sorry ah, I think mei you."
LOL, why're some people so weird.

My ulcer very pain ):
Sinusitis feels like it's coming back, throat's getting bad.
The sky keeps flashing, & I'm scared of lightning.
Please know that I hate it when people cancel dates on me, and YOU, of all people. If you know smthn's not gonna work out then don't open your mouth & suggest it, it's evil to get people's hopes high then dashing them one night before.
All the little bad signs, and tomorrow's bloody results.

Hit the restart

2009-03-05T12:32:00.004+08:00

Hello.
I half wonder why I bother starting up a new blog since my old one(s)'ve never worked out for long and usually end up left alone to collect internet dust. But that aside, LOOK :D The skin's not pure black and white for a change & I guess that's a good thing. Enough with the emoshitz and whining about life, past 2 years've been crappy enough so I've decided, it's time to be happy-girl with happy-blog & pink font.
/edit
Ohokay, so the font's not pink. still, this template's got more pink than the previous one haha.

YAY.

Internet gets boring after a while; there's only so much you can do on facebook & so many videos your eyes can tahan. My brother sucks for having make his reader-friendly blog private so no one can access it. I think the silly boy's turning abit emo. Crazy things puberty do to you hurr. Well. Oho I shall again amuse myself with how 95% of the singtel @jp staff (plus plus managers) own a facebook account, and they're like real working adults (: So cute can, got facebook group some more. Working there's been pretty fun, take some points for #$%^& customers & tired legs/dry mouth/painful toes. Honestly, don't come barging into singtel and shouting at poor trainees (sob) about how come starhub got thisthisthis then we don't have. I really have no fucking clue, I don't own singtel dammit. -smiles politely at customer & runs off to hide in storeroom- OH SAW NJ PEOPLE :D (partially) served Miss Serene Moo two days ago, I think she was shocked to see me in that beidge polo haha.

Met up with people in the past several weeks, it's quite nice to still be in touch after whatever we've all been through. Babaye, I'm glad we keep having random lunchdates together because not seeing you for a very long time like in our J2 year makes me wonder if you still remember me (: Love you muchs & I hope your fellow temp liked her low-calorie subway. Shopping soon! To places where I can afford please thank you very much.

I think things are good just the way they are now, of course if J could stay by my side forever and not whole day need to book back into tekong I'll be much much more a happy girl.

And,
GROOOOOLIE WE NEED TO GO OUT SOON, I MEAN IT.
<3

Omfg results out tmrw. TMRW. Pukes, chokes, dies.
Good luck to everyone, we're all nervous so that's a good sign (:
I hope talismans work.